{"id":31622,"date":"2018-02-27T20:27:00","date_gmt":"2018-02-27T20:27:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/craftyourhappiness.com?p=31622&preview=true&preview_id=31622"},"modified":"2025-03-16T03:21:15","modified_gmt":"2025-03-16T03:21:15","slug":"create-a-memorial-shadow-box","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/craftyourhappiness.com\/2018\/02\/27\/create-a-memorial-shadow-box\/","title":{"rendered":"Create a Memorial Shadow Box & Grieving Those Who Pass"},"content":{"rendered":"
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\"Arlene
\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 My Mom & Me<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

I lost my mom about 4 weeks ago. I’ve never lost anyone close to me before. It was a quick decline which we were grateful for. Many who follow me on my Personal Facebook<\/a> have come to love my parents through things I’ve posted as years have gone by. I’m their only child.\u00a0 All of her grandkids and two\u00a0 great grandkids visited her in the hospital a few days before she passed, along with Roy an I and my dad. They all got to say goodbye to this woman who fiercely adored them. She was 91.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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\u00a0 \u00a0 Click To Read Poem<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

My mom loved<\/em> to clean. (I believe OCD\u00a0 is now the term.) But her house was always spotless and she never sat still a minute. I’m not kidding.\u00a0 When she broke her hip a couple years back and\u00a0 had to be in a wheel chair, she would roll around her house cleaning what she could reach.\u00a0 She didn’t let anything slow her down! I actually wrote a funny poem about that. You can read it by clicking on the small image to the left if you like.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\u00a0I’ll just say this right out: I’m not a fan of funerals and I’ve told my family repeatedly don’t they DARE have a funeral for me… I want a celebration of my life! Stories, laughter, a few tears are allowed, but I want the focus to be the joy of my life. So we didn’t do a funeral for my mom.<\/div>\n
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Grieving is a very personal thing and everyone does it differently. Even though I had not experienced it at the time, my view about this was changed dramatically a few years ago while watching an early Dr. Phil show. This woman has lost her only daughter who was in her twenties I believe. The mother could not get over it and it consumed her thoughts\u00a0 day and night until the point she was planning to kill herself. I’ll never forget what he said: “Why do you choose to focus on that one day she died, rather than celebrating all the days she lived?” The woman was speechless at that point then said “I never thought of it that way.” Neither did I.<\/div>\n
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\"\"So below are a few suggestions to help you grieve the loss of someone you love and hopefully make it a little less painful.\u00a0One thing I did was I made a shadow box for my mom. I chose a shirt she wore a lot over many years as the background, and a photo of her that I have always loved.<\/span><\/div>\n
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Click To View<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

My mom always got mad when you tried to take her picture so it was hard to get good ones. In the photo I chose she is with the family when the great-grandkids were still quite young. It’s always been a favorite of\u00a0 mine. It caught the natural look of joy she had with those great grandkids. She played with them constantly\u00a0, getting down on their level, crawling inside cardboard boxes with them, jumping on the trampoline… and even riding her great-grandson’s push scooter… at age 79 ! (And I have a video<\/a><\/strong> to prove it. )<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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Grieving Tips and Helps<\/h1>\n
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  1. Let yourself grieve. Do NOT hold in feelings. Guys do this more than women I think but it’s SO important to let out the feelings. Cry, sob, beat a pillow. Do what you need.<\/li>\n
  2. Talk about it, when you’re ready.<\/li>\n
  3. Don’t use alcohol or drugs to medicate you’re pain. Call a friend, go for a walk, watch a funny movie instead.<\/li>\n
  4. Focus on the person’s entire life, not just on the one day they died.<\/li>\n
  5. If you’re a reader there are some great books out there.\u00a0 “Healing After Loss<\/a>” is daily quotes or very short stories from famous people. Also “Good Grief<\/a>” has helped many. You can find many secular and religious books<\/a> on the topic.<\/li>\n
  6. Laugh. Happy memories, especially one’s that make you laugh, will do amazing things for you.\u00a0 We are always teasing and joking and remembering the funny things about my mom. One of my daughter’s said “If you see a piece of fuzz on the carpet and it disappears… that’s grandma!”<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    I’m reminded of an old Little House on the Prairie where a widow had several children and she was dying.\u00a0 At the funeral she had written a paper to be read. In it said\u00a0 “Remember me with smiles and laughter… If you can only remember me with tears, then don’t remember me at all”<\/em>.<\/p>\n

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    Good Books to Read<\/h1>\n